Oh my Darling Daughter.
My sweet Girl
You sure can be so sweet when you want to help me with dinner, or help me with laundry. You’re sweet when you want to cuddle and get all of my loves. I love those moments. Those are the moments that I live for everyday when your sweet little eyes open as soon as the sun pierces through your bedroom window. I love watching your goofy self prance around in my heels, even if you can walk better in them than I can. I love your strong-willed personality and how you stand your ground when you don’t want to do something.
However, as much as I love all of these things about you, Sweet Girl, you are pushing my patience to my breaking point as you become a fournager.
Things I wish that could change…..
You picking up your toys on a first or even second request (I may even take a third).
You getting dressed on a first request, I’ll even take second.
You at least trying your dinner on a first and yet again I’ll even take a third request.
Do you see a pattern here? I would just like for you to do what I ask of you on the first-third requests.
Instead do you know what you give me?
Headaches because you give me the defiant look of, “I don’t want to.”
Stress because I need you to learn how to do things for yourself, yet I find myself wanting to just do it myself so it gets done.
A lost voice because we have now resorted to yelling back and forth (which I hate doing and I’m really working on not raising my voice).
And guilt because I wonder all the time if I’m being too hard on you?
If I’m expecting too much from you?
I’m exhausted every night because of our battles. It’s not supposed to be this hard yet. I expect this from you as a teenager, but no you had to start it now. Does this mean that your teenage years are going to be pure hell because that will be a no for me. I won’t be able to handle it even though I’ll have to handle it. Doesn’t mean I want to though. You are giving me a run for my money and it’s something that’s foreign to me. Maybe I’m harder on you or maybe it’s because your brother wasn’t this hard on me at your age. I don’t know what it is, but I don’t like it.
After saying all of this I feel I must stress something to you
Even though I may not like the defiance in you when it comes to simple tasks and yes you must learn that you can’t just squash simple requests because you don’t want to. It won’t work in the real world when you get a job and it doesn’t fly at home. I want to stress how much I want you to still hold on to that defiance. I want you to hold on to that stubbornness. That bull-headedness that lets you stand your ground when confronted with something that you are not comfortable with.
You see, I may not like how defiant, stubborn, or bull-headed you are with me, but I for sure want you to be if you are ever in a situation that you are not comfortable in. There may be times where a partner, a friend, an acquaintance, or even a boss might proposition you. There may be times someone may ask you to do something immoral or degrading. Those are the situations I want my defiant girl to come out. Those are the times I want you to look them in the eyes and fight back. I want you to stand up for yourself and let them know that you are uncomfortable and that is something you will not do nor tolerate. I want you to stand strong and know that you are better than that. Be that girl you were born to be.
And know this
I will always be there to back you up. To stand with you and defend you whenever you need me.
So while I sit here (with my drink in hand) and reflect on the awful week we had, wondering what I’ve done wrong. I will try to focus on the fact that this won’t last forever and if we keep going at this rate, you will definitely be a force to be reckoned with.
And baby girl I for one can’t wait to see that day.
Until then though, PLEASE LISTEN TO YOUR MAMA!!!!